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Entry #4

How Fast is a Bee?

2010-01-03 22:37:04 by sorbitol

Hi,

The other day I saw a bee and it was going quite fast. It made me wonder how fast a bee can actually go.

Is it the same speed as a wasp?

What exactly is a wasp?

In one of his books, Charlie Brooker outlined a similar conundrum; as he was going about the everyday, boring life of a 36-year-old man it suddenly occurred to him that he didn't know what rice was.

"Is it a fruit?" he pondered.

"Is it a vegetable?"

After a moment of further consideration he eventually came to the conclusion that rice is probably a grain and his concerns were immediately pacified.

I suppose what I'm trying to say is, I have just submitted a cartoon to Newgrounds which I hope will challenge the very fabric of what it is you thought you think you know about and about what it is you thought you think you knew (but didn't).

The Inspirational Adventures Of Tyler The Socialist Dog.

This cartoon was devilishly fun to make and if I get enough angry reviews I promise to start work on an immediate sequel.

Oh, if you do watch this joyous cartoon and it's not quite to your liking then here are a few 'toons that caught my eye over the festive season:

Best Friends by (TommysUsername)

Rapez by xavier (marciano)

Fat Sicko by LSD265

He-Man & Skeletor BBF by Klimdeeni

I was going to embed an hilarious You-Tube clip but I've just been that told it's not an "allowed" site.

Instead, I would like to take this opportunity to wish you all a very late Merry Christmas and a spiritually prosperous New Year.

-Sorbitol (Tempest) Onassis.

P.S: How fast is a bee?

How Fast is a Bee?


Comments

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GustavosGustavos

2010-01-03 22:40:52

I know a bee can outrun an eight year old kid. As I've witnessed as I ran for my life, eventually to no avail. The bastard got me. :(

sorbitol responds:

I was also stung at around the same age. I wonder if certain age groups are more likely to be stung?

Mind you, I was quite a fast runner when I was 8, but the little twat came up behind me and there was nothing I could do.

He wouldn't dare try it now 'cos he knows I'm a lot bigger and I always remember a bee's face.


RadicalDylanRadicalDylan

2010-01-03 23:20:21

20 mph is the max speed of a bumble bee.

The average speed is about 15 mph

sorbitol responds:

How the bloody hell did you work that out? You are probably right but how do you know?

The average speed limit is around 30mph so they are quite nimble little fuckers.

That means some of our greatest athletes are slower than bees.

Sometimes I'm ashamed to be human :(


assassin1337assassin1337

2010-01-04 00:30:33

faster than light

sorbitol responds:

I know it seems that way sometimes but I think you're giving the blighter's too much credit.


EmanhattanEmanhattan

2010-01-04 01:50:41

a bee is pretty fast

sorbitol responds:

Someone's just been to Wikipedia, haven't they?


I-smelI-smel

2010-01-04 11:03:25

A group of Japanese honey bees can vibrate their wings so fast around a hornet that the victimised hornet can actually be cooked alive.

No I'm not making this up.
http://video.google.com/videoplay?doc id=-3642419097420044432&q=type%3A gpick&hl=en#

How fast is a bee? 117 degrees fahrenheit.

sorbitol responds:

That was pretty cool!

How many would it take to boil an egg?


NickTraversNickTravers

2010-01-04 11:19:18

If i remember the old zoobooks commercials correctly, a bee can fly almost as fast as a human can run. Kinda vague, but meh.

sorbitol responds:

Who is this human? Why is he trying to outrun a bee?


I-smelI-smel

2010-01-04 11:51:38

Tyler the socialist dog is the weirdest thing.

sorbitol responds:

People find this review: Helpful.


FrozenFireFrozenFire

2010-01-04 12:42:41

A bee can spell better than all humans combined so I figure he's a pretty quick wit.

(Updated ) sorbitol responds:

Bee's also have very neat hairstyles because they use honey-COMBS.

Er... guys?...


Mystery-Moon-Pie-AudMystery-Moon-Pie-Aud

2010-01-04 16:31:41

A bee relative to what?

sorbitol responds:

Relative to speed.


DunsoDunso

2010-01-04 17:13:20

Search your heart (or Wikipedia), and you will find the answer :)

sorbitol responds:

By doing it this way we can all learn together.
This is like a giant classroom floating in space.

Already we are making progress...


JohnnybdesignJohnnybdesign

2010-01-04 19:03:28

Depends if it's a Bee-ver or a Bee-atch.

sorbitol responds:

I "bee" what you did there.


Bronx186Bronx186

2010-01-04 19:08:44

A bee is faster then a rabit getting fucked <3

(Updated ) sorbitol responds:

A rabbit getting fucked is sustained motion.
There is no direct travelling involved therefore it is difficult to gauge "speed".

But a bee is probably faster. You win £10!


xCyLxxCyLx

2010-01-05 21:46:24

How fast can a bee be? Not fast enough says me.

(Updated ) sorbitol responds:

You can probably increase a bee's speed by 15% if you chase it around the garden with a small electric fan. Or a lorry.


ConalConal

2010-01-06 11:37:38

Your flash was so bad it made me angry.

sorbitol responds:

Mission complete.


TommysUsernameTommysUsername

2010-01-07 22:11:36

Hey Sorbitol I'm the guy who made Best Friends. You can imagine how surprised I was when i clicked your profile randomly and saw it up there. Thanks for the promo. Also I loved Tyler the Socialist dog as well as Subordinate Droids really good stuff you've got there.

hell ya, motherfucker

also I was hoping we could be best friends now?

sorbitol responds:

Tommy! Great to hear from you! :D

I've had you down on my "Favourite Artists" list for ages, especially after I saw "Blake & Dwight" and "Burying the Hatchet".

(BTW, whatever happened to "Burying the Hatchet 2"? I swear I saw it here once... unless it was just some beautiful dream?)

Man, "Best Friends" is the funniest Flash I've seen since Chuck's New Tux. I was hoping to get more people to view it so that it can get some recognition without it having to be nominated in the Treasure Hunt! XD

And as for your generous proposition, I will happily be your best friend... FOREVER!

*High Five*


ConalConal

2010-01-16 19:51:30

All abominable flash aside, there's no need to turn my review into a personal argument.

(Updated ) sorbitol responds:

If you leave a cunt-brained review then I will treat you like a cunt.

And you are one ugly little fucker.

Suicide is still an option. Take it.


piecaptinpiecaptin

2010-01-30 16:23:16

piss

(Updated ) sorbitol responds:

YOU FUCKING BASTERD!
WAT DID I EVER DO 2 U?
YOU R HARTLESS AND CROOL!!!
Y WUD U DO VISS 2 ME?????


SirWolfySirWolfy

2010-04-09 17:24:15

cum cocks penoscrotal hypospadias

sorbitol responds:

YOU FUCKING BASTERD!
WAT DID I EVER DO 2 U?
YOU R HARTLESS AND CROOL!!!
Y WUD U DO VISS 2 ME?????